Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Le Greasy Pole Francais

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/newsbysector/banksandfinance/9374167/Stage-set-for-fireworks-after-Barclays-board-meltdown.html

Oh boy, the waters of the Thames from Blackfriar’s (memories of Roberto Calvi & the Banco Ambrosiano imbroglio), to Traitor’s Gate of the White Tower, to Wapping Steps, to the Isle of Dogs (aka Canary Wharf) are more than a little roiled this coming July 4th by L’Affaire Barclays de LIBOR. Diamond Bob, a man known for his self-effacement, modest remuneration and controlled ego, plus his sybaritic Godolphin & Princeton daughter via Twitter, have just thrown the whole omelette simultaneously in the faces of Mervyn King, The Old Lady of Threadneedle Street herself, little Georgie O (temporarily of 11 Downing Street) and probably Uncle Tom Cobley an’ all. Quite a Prologue to a little chat and a cupp’a with the Treasury Select Committee in the Commons tomorrow. A very forceful move by an under-paid American in London to slag off the Government of the day, HM Treasury and the BofE with one fell swoop. He can forget the honorary KCVO or any other gong right now; rather being assured that the gong does indeed toll for him. The merits be damned, a City banker of any nationality, gender or sexual orientation has quite a short career half-life after explaining “It were the Deppity Guv’nor what made me do it, honest”. I think Diamond Bob’s pass to the biggest hospitality tent of them all in SW19 may be up for grabs, if the rain stops for the rest of the week, and those of his Chairman and COO too.

Talking of half-lives and in other strange news, a Swiss lab, acting on behalf of Al Jazeera, suggests that the noble and Nobel freedom fighter Yasser Arafat, aka Abu Ammar, may have been poisoned, on account of traces of that very nasty isotopic toxin Polonium 210 being found on his dishdasha or his frilly white unmentionables. Was he having tea with Mr. Litvinenko in the Ritz one afternoon, or was it with his buddy Vlad Vlad Putin? Surely not the same guys who bred the Stuxnet worm!


I had always wondered what it was about little Lib Dem Deppity PM’y Nicky Cloggy. Now he reveals it was what we suspected all along – self-inflicted brain damage. Very sad. Worryingly, he suggests this should require new and ever more lunatic “policies”. Let’s hope the men in white coats take care of him first and help him into a room with upholstered walls; where he cannot hurt himself (or us plebes).

Of much more real concern and sadness is that two RAF Tornado’s could have collided over the North Sea with the apparent loss of two crew members (and death of a third).


Le Vieux Guillaume à Paris has raided the home in the 16th of M. and Mme. Carla Bruni; showing just how careless of them it was to let Francois and his courtesans take over l’Élysée. As in Italy, the most important reason to be top chien is that it bestows immunity from prosecution for a boat-load of crimes committed while clawing and scratching up the greasy pole. For Chirac, senility and dementia were a viable defense but the Bruni’s will find that one hard to pull off.

The Euro crisis is taking a break while the Troika tries to reconcile Greek debits and credits. There must be some mistake as the debits vastly exceed the credits until the books have been grilled, sautéed and deep fried. Normal service will be resumed next week.

Simon

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