Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Job Opening - Cypriot Quisling

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/cyprus/9941478/Cyprus-turns-to-Russia-after-parliament-rejects-levy-on-bank-savings.html


Eh bien, Tante Angela, how about those crazy Cypriots? Was für ein Plan B, habst du?

They (at least those outside Mr. Anastasiades administration) were smart enough to figure out that ‘stability levy’ equals ‘daylight robbery’. So they called deinen Bluff, and mailed in den mittel Finger. Parliament punted hard for the long grass.

Mr. Michaelis Sarris, the Cypriot FM, took on the message loud and clear and left subito on the first non-stop Antonov to Moscow to see every Cypriot’s buddy, Vlad Vlad (waving another middle finger to Angela, who had expressly said Nein to any truck with the Russkies); leaving the central bank Guv, Mr. Panicos OMGicos to do what he eponymously does best. Which is to stay away from Berlin und Frankfurt AM. Of course, this is not an unalloyed source of cheer for Uncle Vanya. He has a bunch of Euro’s owed already and due soon and is surely being asked for a lot more over forever at minimal vigorish; with keine Bundesbank Guarantie it now appears. Plus all that oligarch loot held in trust for his old age in Cypriot banks. Not an easy call for Vlad. In for a Kopeck, in for a Ruble, Rouble or Rumble. A long lease on a naval yard at Limassol and parking some big Bear nuclear bombers at RAF Akrotiri is looking better every minute. (They may need tugs to bring the boats from Latakia).

So Angela, how does your new pal Dodgy Dave in London feel about your Cyprus squeeze play now?

There’s a lot that could happen in the next few days and it probably will. Angela, the lovely Christine (the one in the Hermès foulard, not Christina de la Casa Rosada), and their buddy Professor Mario 2 Draghi are going to have some fat to chew. It could be very unpalatable. No doubt they are savouring the delicious irony that a Troika is a Russian conveyance propelled by three horses (arses). On second thoughts, since Christina de Kirchner is nearby in Roma, why not invite her over to Nicosia. Her experience in stiffing foreign creditors and threatening small islands could be invaluable. The Teutonic last name inherited from nasty Nestor can’t hurt.

As a small footnote of history, Cyprus, unlike Greece, Crete and other Aegean islands was invaded neither by Italians nor Germans during WWII. The Axis dropped a few bombs and the Cypriots joined the Cyprus Regiment and fought valiantly as Allies, as did many Greeks; spurred on by visions of Enosis that did not materialize at the war’s end, in spite of turning their guns on the British in the 50’s. Independence from Britain arrived first (with the Archbishop becoming PM – an idea for Justin Welby OE?), but threats of enforced Enosis from post coup Athens in 1974 brought the Ottomans back to occupy much of the northern part of their erstwhile island, where they remain to this day. (Always get your retaliation in first). A sad divided island, the Greek side now petitioning the Russians for succour. There’s one born every minute.

Can brave little Cyprus defy the Euro-Axis again and send the Prussians home or will Parliament be frog-marched and dragooned back into session to “re-vote right this time” in true Euro-tradition and embrace Deutsche Hegemonie in accordance with Clausewitzian doctrine? Maybe, but shooting the Russian bear where it hurts may also be a high risk strategy. They can usually find kneecaps with the first round. Who will the Cypriot Quisling be?

Simon

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